Love of My Life

I have been doing alot of deep thinking lately.  Not that I don't usually, but circumstances in my life have caused me to reflect on the past, the present and the future.  As I move past middle-age (it is doubtful I will live to be 114 years old, so yes I am beyond middle age) there is more past now then there is future; at least in quantity.

It is staggering just how many lives I have had already.  Or should I say "careers"  Some are more jobs than careers but hopefully you get the idea.  Lets see. 

I have: Mowed lawns, hoed and turned watermelon vines, loaded and stack watermelons, baled hay, cut corn out of beans, worked at an A&W, been a janitor,  a mover, and worked a snack bar; all before graduating from Junior College.  This does not count two full seasons practicing and playing basketball for Spoon River College. Then there was the summer job working in a factory and the 1 1/2 years in puratory there following my time at SRC.

Since graduating from Western Illinois University I have been a staff announcer, disc jockey, news reporter, sports director, play-by-play man.  I have worked both TV and radio.   I have done voice-over work and I have produced and edited numerous project, for various clients.

Along the way I have worked with a travel agency...sold encyclopedias,...co-owned, published and sold advertising for a bridal magazine...taught high school....and have my own financial services business.

Whew, I am tired from writing all that and I am sure if I thought harder I would likely think of some other endeavors I have been in.  I won't even mention the stations, teams, and free-lance broadcasting jobs. Now throw in there son, brother, student, cousin, boyfriend, husband, father, brother-in-law, ex-husband and friend. 

The point and the title of this entry is to look at my life in different sections rather than as a whole.  After all,  to get to the "whole" person you have to look at the sum of their parts and there have been lots of moving parts in my life.

So why the moment of reflection?  Why now, at this time? Well, I am coming out of a relationship where I thought with all my heart that I had found the true love of my life.  Details are not important here but for months I walked around consumed with the grief and mourning of that lost love.  I was miserable and not able to find much happiness or joy in life.  It was bad!   It is that valley I referred to in an earlier blog.

But here is the deal.  What does "love of my life" really mean?  If you break it down as I did earlier...I have had many different lives.  Now that is not to imply that I had that special someone along each of those times,but seasons come and seasons go. In fact, that is bibical:

 For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
  a time to be born, and a time to die;
 a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
 a time to kill, and a time to heal;
 a time to break down, and a time to build up;
 a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
 a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
 a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
 a time to seek, and a time to lose;
 a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
 a time to tear, and a time to sew;
 a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
 a time to love, and a time to hate;
 a time for war, and a time for peace.
(Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 ESV)

She WAS the love of my life...at that part of my life.  There were even seasons within our relationship.  The first date was the "time to be born".  The dating and courting process was the "time to plant".   The love and affection we shared was "a time to build up". The death of loved ones during our time was the "time to mourn".   It goes on and on.

Now apply all that back to the whole life experience.  The scripture starts out that we are all born.  We can't escape that fact.  Each of us will go through every one of these seasons.  We will, in one form or another, weep and laugh, mourn and dance, embrace and refrain from embracing, keep and cast away. It is part of life.  None of us can avoid any of it.

But look how the author of Ecclesiates ends this particular passage.  "A time for peace."   Is it an accident that he writes of all these seasons of life and then concludes talking about a "time of peace"?

We can be assured, no matter the circumstances, if we place our lives and our confidence in God that through it all we will receive peace. True peace can only be found in one place and that is the Cross.

Love of my life?  The true love in my life and in yours is Jesus Christ and the love he showed on the Cross.  It is there whether we realize it or not. His love is there through ALL seasons.

" And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us,....(John 1:14 ESV)

 The word IS Jesus. Jesus IS God.  God IS love.  His love endures FOREVER!

  “All flesh is like grass
  and all its glory like the flower of grass.
 The grass withers,
  and the flower falls,
 but the word of the Lord remains forever.”
  And this word is the good news that was preached to you.
(1 Peter 1:24-25 ESV)

Doesn't it make you feel safe and secure that there is one person that will always love you; that God's love will never leave you?  It does me!  God will not leave me regardless of the season I am in. He proved that by living the life I could not live and dying the death I deserved to die and defeating sin and death when he rose from the grave.  AND he did it all BEFORE I was even born...BEFORE I had a season at all! What love!

I look forward to many more seasons in my life: Father-in-law, grandfather, etc.. I will have seasons of loving and being loved. There will continue to be more seasons of trial. But, I know what I have been seeking through the many seasons so far, the LOVE of my life, has been with me the entire time.  Praise God!

I hope you know that kind of love too.  If not, look to the Cross.  No greater love was ever known!

Thanks for reading!

Jeff